Framework
Non-Violent Communication (NVC)
Marshall Rosenberg's four-step framework for assertive, non-blaming communication that produces respect from even difficult conversations.
How it works
- 1Step 1 — Observation: state the specific behavior you observed, without evaluation or judgment ('When I see/hear...').
- 2Step 2 — Feeling: name the emotion it creates in you, not a thought or interpretation ('I feel...').
- 3Step 3 — Need: articulate what you need instead and why it matters to you ('Because I need...').
- 4Step 4 — Request: make a concrete, actionable request — not a demand ('Would you be willing to...').
- 5The assertive middle path: NVC is neither passive (avoiding the conversation) nor aggressive (attacking the person). It's firm, explicit, and respectful simultaneously.
- 6Difficult conversations become less threatening when the other person realizes you're naming your experience — not accusing them of a character flaw.
Hear it on the podcast
The Hidden Leadership GapListen to the episodeMore from this episode
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